The Trash King

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Catapult happy raccoon gets caught red handed ~~what color are his hands now?~~, and interrogated!

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"I see that," Steve told him, "and I will absolutely tackle you again if you don't cut it out. But we're not completely unreasonable here."

Well. Other than "let's string up the raccoon guy."

He toyed with his shiny, shiny practically indestructible, stupidly expensive SEAL-issued watch, making eye contact with the raccoon. "We might be able to make a deal."

Edited Date: 2021-07-07 04:58 pm (UTC)

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Well it's a good thing Steve had that watch, because the only shiny thing Diego had was knives and that might be a little threatening.

"What do you say, Ranger Rick?" Diego asked.

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Oh shit. That looked pretty fucking special. TK leaned in, trying to get a better look. The Trash King would totally reward him if he brought back something that shiny!

. . . And if he didn't bring it in at all, maybe he could just have something that shiny!

". . . We can maybe make a deal," he said carefully. "What do you want to know?"

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what_the_shock

"How do we get our people out of the holes for a start," Miguel said. "And how do we stop any more of them?"

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TK rubbed his little raccoon paws together, eyes glued on that watch.

"I don't know," he said. "I just use the holes, I don't make 'em."

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firstofitskind

Well that was something, at least.

"Of course," Liam nodded. "Can you tell us anything about who does?"

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throughaphase

"Or what the holes are used for? Something?" Kitty asked.

She'd been a single parent with no clues for way too long here, give her something.

Edited Date: 2021-07-09 12:30 am (UTC)

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“And then you’ll give me that thing?” TK asked, making grabby hands at the watch.

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"Maybe," Steve said, glaring. "You haven't told us jack yet and I'm entirely out of patience. If you're a low level, useless raccoon with nothing to tell us, you don't deserve shiny watches."

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"Just tell us something useful already," Diego snapped, entirely out of patience himself. "You're lucky the watch is even on the table."

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TK looked at him. Then at the watch.

“I am a very important raccoon,” he said. “I was the first one to earn a catapult!”

He pointed to Diego.

“Maybe I’ll catapult you later. Can humans fly?”

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what_the_shock

"Can raccoons?" Miguel asked. "I don't need a catapult to throw you. Earn a catapult how? From whom?"

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firstofitskind

Nobody would be catapulting- or throwing- anybody on Liam's watch, thank you.

"Is whoever's out there handing out catapults the one making the holes?"

That would explain the random crap that had been pelting people out of nowhere the last few days.

Edited Date: 2021-07-09 04:46 am (UTC)

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“I don’t know who makes them,” TK said. “The Trash King’s the one who set up the reward system though.”

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throughaphase

"There's a Trash King?" Kitty asked, and then realized that like, sure why not.

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"For fu--" Steve clenched his hand into a frustrated fist. "Where's the Trash King?"

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This wasn't the dumbest thing he had been a part of, but it was up there.

"Keep in mind he really seems like he's going to punch you in the face if you don't give us some useful information soon," Diego said, nodding his head at Steve.

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“That was useful!” TK protested. “This one didn’t even know the Trash King existed!”

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what_the_shock

"Useful like where is he?" Miguel asked, "and why is he doing this?"

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firstofitskind

... Was this some weird sort of raccoon-solidarity revenge for that time Calvin tried to throw the raccoons in the trash by declaring a Recycling Amnesty Day?

(Recycling Amnesty Day was never going to be a thing, thank you.)

"What does this 'Trash King' want with our people?"

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throughaphase

"We need actual details," Kitty added.

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“Woah hey. You got it all wrong,” TK said. “The Trash King doesn’t care about people! He wants your trash!”

A beat.

“Allegedly.”

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"He's been taking people for two and half weeks, asshole," Steve snarled. "Where is he? I'll give him all the trash he can handle."

Possibly by kicking him straight into a trash barge.

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"Allegedly, what the hell does that mean?" Diego asked.

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